Damn.
It’s been a long week at Camp.
Hard,
Difficult,
Trying.
My biggest Challenge?
Eating.
We have 3 “set” Meal times.
I haven’t eaten 3 “meals” since I left Treatment.
That was almost 8 MONTHS ago.
Has it REALLY been that long?
Good-Grief.
That’s ALMOST a year!?!
Yikes.
My week STARTED out great…
Taking food and sitting with the Campers.
Ended a bit poorly….
Standing,
Wandering,
And being preoccupied.
Small bites here and there,
Coffee,
Nothing.
A few confrontations.
I hate THAT.
I WILL lie.
I’m sorry.
It’s not personal.
It is DEFINITELY my Eating Disorder talking.
I feel emotionally exhausted.
My Anxiety is at an all-time HIGH.
Stuck.
And rising.
I’ve got 1 more week…..
My coping mechanism until it passes?
I will get quiet.
Withdrawn.
Cry when I am alone.
Not eat.
Pathetic, I know.
I need a Nap.
And a nice loooong HOT shower!
That’ll cure anything, right?
Yes,
A Nap!
“For THIS, too, shall pass….”
Shelly's Recovery 